“By the time the Lost Girls returned to the beach, the sky was the color of wet slate and an army of angry clouds massed along the horizon, awaiting further instructions.”
-Beauty Queens by Libba Bray, page 18
Absolutely beautiful writing! This sentence happened early on in the book and it was this sentence which won my desire to finish the story regardless of how it turned out. I think this is one of the aspects of a good novel which GLOW was missing for me. Too much telling and not enough showing sucks the life out of the story.
I can imagine Bob Ross (the PBS painter who always found a happy little bush or tree to brighten a painting) painting this picture and using similar words to explain what was happening in his creation as he loaded the canvas with oil.
Had I been the one writing this story, I might’ve overlooked this opportunity to paint in the readers mind by simply saying, “By the time the Lost Girls returned to the beach, a storm was brewing.” How blah and boring and completely flat! Instead of a Bob Ross masterpiece (or Libba Bray for that matter), it comes out looking (and sounding) like this: