e-Book Review: Becoming Jolie by Monique O'Connor James

Becoming Jolie by Monique O'Connor James
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

Becoming Jolie is yet another example of why I find it hard to like self-published books.

So far, in my experience, self-published books are riddled with problems. Problems that an editor should've/would've caught. Problems that using more than one beta reader could've pointed out. And I'm not talking just typos because typos exist even in traditionally published books. Even minor issues...like the wrong name or a misplaced prop...can slip through on traditionally published books.

However, self-published books or books published by small, online publishing companies tend to have far too many of these issues.

A few might bother me but won't distract too much from the story. But, when you have little thing after little thing after little thing, they really begin to pile up. And that makes it difficult for me to like the book.

That is my major complaint with this book: all the little things.

The inconsistencies with props and surroundings.

--Jolie goes to the bar to get a pitcher of beer and 4 plastic cups, but then everyone is popping the lid off their beer bottles. ??? Where did those come from and what happened to those plastic cups pointed out to me as being served at a bar?

--The need to walk to the back of a convenience shop to get cell service after coming off the highway. ??? In my experience, you normally find better cell reception outside of buildings. She went in only so she could run into another character.

--After traveling a long time, Jolie & Tucker walk into her apartment and the first thing he does is turn on the t.v. and THEN he drops his bag. I don't know how important the t.v. is to him, but I think most people would drop their bags first and THEN go turn on the t.v. to relax. I know that sounds nit-picky, but it's just another example of one of the many little things that irked me.

The odd and inconsistent behaviors from the characters

--Frog: He acts like such a douche/jerk in the beginning but then suddenly has a change of heart and helps out? And I think even a backward backwoods cop would've acted more...cop-like...than Frog did in the bar and at the police station. And what about that bar scene? Do you really think a cop would allow a guy he knows to knock him out in public and then not charge the guy later for assault?

--The FBI: They weren't even really characters in the book, and yet...Not gonna touch that one.

--Hutch & Jolie: I didn't even realize they were going to kiss the first time (it happened so quick and out of the blue) and then it's like they forgot it happened, too. Their whole relationship was awkward and wishy-washy. And I lost all respect (if I had any) for Jolie from her response to being rejected:

"...Hutch was distant as he pushed her to the floor and stood.
     "Please, don't leave.""

I'm sorry, but she is either really needy which makes her weak and dislikable, or she is the epitomy of dumb girls everywhere who only find self-worth and happiness in the person she is with. What self-respecting girl would beg a guy to stay after he rejects her forward advances and DUMPS her on the floor? How pathetic.

And there were some issues with grammar and a serious overuse of passive voice.

But the story itself? The story itself was...absurd. The whole idea of the thesis which sent Jolie to Folette seemed far-fetched. The big ta-da near the end about Jolie was painfully obvious much earlier in the book than when the ta-da was revealed. There were so many unrealistic things which happened in the story and made it unbelievable. And the ending? Totally had that cartoonishness where the good guy goes to confront the bad guy and said bad guy confesses to all his evil-doings for no good reason, except to tell the reader what happened and why he did it.

Becoming Jolie's saving grace was Tucker. His character was consistent and most often seemed reasonably believable.

I have another of Ms. O'Connor James's books already queued up on my ereader, so I will give her another shot, but I doubt I will purchase anything else from her if the next book has similar issues.

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